Recovery is a Journey

"Oh my achin' Bones"

Medical science and very many persons' practical experience says our bodies change every decade. For instance, if a male is going to have a "beer gut" after being slim and trim their whole life, no matter how they eat, it will probably first show up about age 30. Then, that 20/20 vision goes at 40 and the teeth start falling apart at 50 and the arthritis kicks in at 60, etc. Drinking alcohol and abusing drugs only speeds up the process. Accepting and coping with these changes is not easy. It may even require some life-style changes. And, it is hard to adjust at "our age." The truth is, it is hard to adjust at any age. Dealing with life on life's terms is not comfortable.

And, it's not only our problems with health, it is everything in life that requires our attention and our coping. So, what can we do? First, how about talking with your counselor on a routine basis. For those of you reading this who are not seeing a counselor, this might be a good time to start talking more with your sponsor, or seeing a therapist, going to church more, or talking with your friends about the some important stuff and not just about the superficial things in our lives. Here's a brief list of things to talk about:

• Things we are worried about or that scare us.
• Things that create anger or just really bother you a lot.
• Things that seem to make us sad.
• And, how talking about the stuff that tends to excite or energize us. Take some time to share how that helps you cope with life.

How are we coping with life? These are troublesome times. Here are some questions to ask about whatever your strategy is:

1. Does the strategy work? How much does it work?
2. If it generally doesn't work, why do you keep using the same method of coping? Remember the recovery definition of "insanity?" When we do the same thing over and over expecting different results.
3. If the strategy does work, does it have a negative side?
4. Is there a cost to the strategy? How high is the cost?
5. When does the strategy work best? Does it always work, or only sometimes?
6. Are there any patterns to your strategies? Do the choices tend to match any of the following coping styles?

• Do you tend to take action, face things head on, and try to solve the problem?
• Do you tend to talk to somebody when you have difficulties?
• Do you tend to lie low, avoiding or distancing yourself from the problem?
• Do you tend to keep difficulties to yourself?
• Do you tend to choose strategies with harmful consequences?

"Our greatest glory is not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall."

"Show me a thoroughly satisfied man and I will show you a failure."

"Men are anxious to improve their circumstances, but are unwilling to improve themselves."