Defeating Patterns of Behavior

"This program is just not working!" While it is probably true that there are some bad recovery programs out there, it is not true that the fault always lies with the program. Just to be a little blunt…the programs didn't call you, you called them. We say it a lot in recovery, "Keep coming back. It works if you work it." We also say, "If nothing changes, then nothing changes." There are times when we may enter a new program, but continue with the previous patterns of behavior. Below are some of the ways we may be defeating the program:

  1. Withholding information
  2. Putting the responsibility for the needed changes on someone else
  3. Not completing assignments
  4. Not attending your sessions, or repeatedly either canceling or rescheduling those appointments
  5. Keeping an attitude that change is impossible
  6. Avoiding information that will create anxiety
  7. Believing that something even worse will happen if I change my behavior
  8. Imagining that it takes too much of your time to change
  9. Focusing on another person's problems to avoid your own
  10. Praying for divine intervention and then not doing anything for yourself
  11. Helping someone else avoid change so they can then help you to avoid any changes
  12. Continuing to be an observer of other people and circumstances rather than becoming a participant
  13. Believing that your old patterns are too severe to change or at least, they are too unique for anyone to understand
  14. Convincing yourself that you are a, why change now
  15. Keep answering questions with questions
  16. Blame somebody
  17. Continue with the excuse that all those people down at NA or AA are just a bunch of hypocrites anyway..."At least, I'm no hypocrite!"
  18. Maintain the image that you are not addicted to just have mental problems
  19. Build up resentments and hang one to them for a long time
  20. Do only what you have to do to get by

Rick B.

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Dr. Candace McDaniel
8021 East R.L. Thornton Fwy, Suite A
Dallas, Texas 75228

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